Saturday, February 6, 2010

Blog has moved!

Umm... wow this is awkward.  How should I say this... there's a whole new blog.  We don't even update this blog anymore.  If you want to see our latest posts, go to  It's roughly a million times better than this blog.

Also, you use the Google Friend Connect thingy, you should re-subscribe to the new blog.  That way your picture will show up there and Lara and I will feel like you give a shit.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Reason #17: Hipsters

Hippies taught us to reject war and embrace love.  Punks taught us to reject establishment and embrace individuality.  The Grunge scene basically said f*ck everything, but at the very least it made us question our reality.  And all three of those movements taught us how to transform our reality with awesome mind altering substances.  It seems like every subculture has made a meaningful mark on society.

But what do hipsters teach us?  After living in the Lower Haight for a year this is the message I'm getting:

About clothing:
Extremely tight pants were designed to be worn by men.  Scarves are meant to be worn as accessories, not for warmth.  And it's worth the extra money for an outfit if it looks like you bought it at Goodwill.

About transportation:
Ride a bicycle.  But not one with off-road tires.  Or a suspension.  Or gears.  Or breaks.  And make sure you spend a shit-ton of money on it.  And paint it bright yellow and purple.  And wear a stupid little hat when you ride it.

About technology:
If Apple makes one, buy one.

About music:
Make it screechy and Canadian and ridiculously weird.  And make it impossible to play at parties.

About life, religion, love and society:
I don't know, because I haven't heard hipsters stop talking about man scarves, track bikes, iPads and Of Montreal concerts.

Granted I've been to an Of Montreal concert.  And I just bought a flannel shirt from  And I'm wearing a MUNI beanie right now while I sit here drinking wine and blogging on my netbook.  I'm a fucking hipster.  Get me out of here.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Reason #18: Not safe for work

Alright, I'm sorry for back-to-back corporate gripes, but this was too good to wait on.  I tried to access this [riveting, addictive] blog at work today and this is what I got:

There's a lot of fantastic ways I could take this post from here, so I'm going ruin it by explaining that my corporate firewall automatically blocks all new URLs until they can be crawled by our security software and deemed "safe for work."

Which begs the question: will And Now This Is Happening make the cut?

Which begs the question: if it does, then does that mean we suck at life?

The answer to the 2nd question is clearly no, since Snacks and Shit is safe for work. And on a higher level I can't really get pissed off about this.  Thanks to my many friends in the construction industry, I receive "not safe for work" emails every day and I've never heard a thing about it from anybody.  So I should have just stopped this post with the screenshot, which is still fucking ridiculous.  Reason 18.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Reason #19: Account Manager Says What?

5:18 p.m., 5th floor, Goodby, Silverstein & Partners

Just overheard a coworker (on the phone) say to another (who was home sick), verbatim:

"Do you really think your health is more important than this ad?"

While I'd like to give her the benefit of the doubt and chalk it up to sarcasm, my four years in advertising lead me to believe otherwise.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Reason #20: Glowing Rectangles

Between now and our departure (Feb. 22) we're going to give you 20 reasons why we're going.  There are far more than 20, but exactly 20 worth blogging about.

Reason #20: 90% of waking life spent staring at glowing rectangles

Thanks Nick Anderson for bringing this to my attention.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

FYI we're extremely important

Hello. I'm not sure whether or not you heard, but Lara and I are moving to New Zealand. We're quitting our jobs and selling all of our stuff and getting the hell out of here.

If you already knew that, great. You're one step ahead. You also probably know how ridiculously important we are. If you didn't know that, let me break it down for you. We're both extremely funny and popular, and we have like tons of friends.

Now listen up. Ashton Kutcher doesn't take a dump without Tweeting about it. Likewise, Adam and Lara don't take a year long hiatus without keeping our fan base updated and informed. Hence we've started this blog. Because what we say and do is extremely important and you should all really care about it.